Colorado Life Coach: Disappointment
It hurts. Sometimes, it really hurts.
Maybe I thought by this time in my life (meaning, by the time I was this old), I’d either be used to disappointment, handle it better, or able to dodge it, but I’m not.
It still hurts, and sometimes the surprise is what catches me.
If I were able to predict and prepare, maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much. Maybe if I walked around waiting for the next shoe to drop, it wouldn’t hurt so much, because I’d expect it. Then I’d just say, “Oh, there you are again.”
The problem is, I’m an optimist. I believe God. I look for the good. I believe things will work out. I believe the pain is worth it. I keep trying. Someone once told me I’m loyal beyond what I should be.
So I get hurt when:
~Someone lets me down
~Things don’t turn out the way I hoped
~Plans change into less than I was told
~Someone else gets asked to do something I wanted to do
~Friends don’t call
~People don’t care or like what I’m doing
~Someone else does what I’ve done and they get a lot of recognition, but I didn’t
Sometimes life moves along smoothly, but disappointment always returns. And I’m always shocked.
I know people who use humor in everything they do. When life is hard, things don’t seem funny to me.
I’m sad. I’m lonely.
I listen to uplifting music, pray, talk to friends, and go to counseling. I eat high protein, low carb food, and exercise regularly. I even do neurofeedback, get chiropractic care, and an occasional massage. I practice self-care.
I have a degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. I get this stuff!! I teach this stuff. I can help others navigate their way out of this stuff. And here I sit, disappointed again.
The bible says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Proverbs 13:12. I think the problem is it takes so long to fulfill the desire, that sometimes the heart is too sick.
I know many Christian friends who would say that we’re not going to see true healing until we die. I get that. I believe that to a point. But, Jesus said that he came to heal the broken-hearted. He didn’t say he’d heal them after they died. I believe him. I love this verse. I live by it. Sometimes it’s just hard, because my heart longs so deeply for the desires I believe God placed there. It’s hard to wait.
I once heard about a woman who had been married for 60 years. She was asked how to have a good marriage that lasted. Her answer: “Sometimes you have to get through a hard decade or two.” Wow!
And even in the midst of disappointment, I got an email from a friend. It’s a devotional by Liz Curtis Higgs on Leah from the Bible. My friend even highlighted the areas that I would highlight for you:
When no one else sees, God sees. When no one else cares, God cares.
God sees. God hears. And God’s timing is always perfect.
Thank you God, and thank you friend for the reminder today!
How about you? How do you deal with disappointment?
This post written by Colorado Life Coach, Carrie O’Toole, M.A.